A Royal Affair: Pawn Takes Queen
Objectively, Nikolaj Arcel’s A Royal Affair tells a fascinating tale of palace intrigue, the birth of the Enlightenment, treachery, insanity, and illicit sex. These are all things that I enjoy watching. I also […]
Exegesis Of A Genius: The Charlie Sheen Cinematic Oeuvre
(Following is an excerpt from Dr. Herman O. Gorvald’s upcoming work, Infinite Sheen And The Recursiveness of Being, which he has generously allowed us to publish, exclusively, for the delight […]
Giant, Deadly Piles of Spider Shat
Sometimes, you think up a headline for a blog post and you just have no choice but to use it. Also, sometimes (always) you are given the opportunity to see a […]
Mind Control Double Feature #36: Manimal!
I am not an animal. I am a human being. I am a man! As defiantly romantic as the above quote sounds, it just isn’t true. Men (and women) are, […]
Spring Breakers Broke My Brain
The more I think about it, the weirder Spring Breakers becomes. It is in no way a normal kind of movie. It is a Harmony Korine movie, and Harmony Korine […]
Stoker Will Crawl Up Your Skirt
I am a big fan of Park Chan-Wook‘s. Perhaps that makes me a Wookie? If so, I can live with that. His films—previously made in Korea in Korean—are bloody and […]
Mind Control Double Feature #35: Those Troublesome Irish Troubles
The trouble with Irish independence is the same trouble with independence sought by any peoples throughout history: you spend ten, twenty, a hundred, five hundred years murdering your oppressors, the […]
The Great Waldo Pepper’s Nostalgia Vortex
If I asked you to name that George Roy Hill film, you know, the one written by William Goldman and starring those two handsome dudes, Robert Redford and, uh, the […]
Moon Movies
The moon. What is it doing up there? Where did it come from? Who lives inside it? How did they get there? Why aren’t we digging inside it this very […]
Crood Awakening
Today I received the following email: Isn’t that amazing? I’m only disappointed that I wasn’t able to trek to this mysterious, Neolithic, monument to see it gussied up with new […]
Death By Backstory Part 2: Snake Plissken Edition
It is our present fate that every movie we once loved will soon be remade into something bland, unimaginative, and, in a tiny way we wouldn’t even notice save for […]
Twilight’s Last Gleaming: Exactly As Good As It Sounds
One thing I love about old movies is the window they open on the past. It doesn’t matter when they’re set, be they westerns, science fiction, or contemporary. It doesn’t […]
Mind Control Double Feature #34: Bon Voyeur-age
Do you know that feeling you get, when you’re peering in on a strange and mysterious culture of which you have little understanding, and then the police come and throw […]
A Lost Oz
Oz the Bland and Predictable. Oz The Dull and Pitiable. Oz The Safe and Marketable. Oz The…zzzzzzzzzzz. Could you make a movie worse than Sam Raimi’s Oz The Great and […]