You’re dying. In twenty years, or in six months, or on this coming Wednesday you’re going to die. Whichever it is; there’s no escape. So what are you doing with […]
In which gangs of dangerous women destroy every man in sight! Then destroy themselves!
Damn it’s good to be a gangster. Unless that means pulling someone’s beating heart out of their chest, because that can get really messy.
Murder! Madness! Satanic rituals! Executions! Must be halloween…
That’s okay. Just let it all out. Being emotional isn’t a sign of weakness; on the the contrary, it is a sign of depth and potential award nomination. This is particularly true if you happen to be Jeff Bridges.
Is there anything funnier than religion? Religion is like dancing with penguins. The hilarity never stops. Unless you yourself are religious, in which case every religion but one, yours, is […]
When you really think about it, thoughts are problematic. I mean: what are they good for? Can you eat them? Will they keep you from chaffing? How many do you […]
What is it about little girls? They’re spooky. Headstrong. Probably possessed by spirits or intergalactic alien intelligences. Like cats, they’re entirely too curious. They’re the epitome of innocence. Yet they […]
I’m the Supreme Being, not a historian, and am therefore unqualified to say why there is no figure more revered in the annals of United States history than the con […]
There are two kind of men in Western films. There are those with ropes around their necks and those that do the shooting. Or maybe there are men in black […]
I hate to start this double feature write-up on a down note, but the thing is, you’re going to die. Not anytime soon, heavens no! You’re going to live a […]
Are your eyes bigger than your stomach? I sure hope not. That would be seriously gross. Unless you’ve got a really small stomach? But if so, how are you even […]
The life of the boxer is a fabled one. Hard luck guys scrabbling to better themselves the only way they know how. Harder luck guys never making it at all. Guys bought by mobsters to take a fall. Guys too hard-headed to take the fall shot dead by said mobsters.